- 4 YEAR OLD: "Mommy why does she have a baby in her tummy?"
- MOM: "She is going to be a mommy. She is married". I fibbed about the last part.
- 4 YEAR OLD: "I am going to have a baby someday."
- MOM: "Oh really. Well you have to be a big girl and be married. Do you like boys?"
- 4 YEAR OLD: "Yes"
- MOM (thinking to herself): YIKES!!
- 4 YEAR OLD: "I'm going to marry HIPPO."
- MOM (still thinking to herself): Oh thank god for Hippo. Her 3 foot long orange with yellow spots stuffed Hippopotamus!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Thoughts on Marriage When You are 4
As a parent you worry about how soon your daughter(s) will start to think about boys, the birds and the bees and even marriage. Well my heart raced a little the other day when my 4 year old and I were watching 90210 and she asked... "Mommy why does she have a baby in her tummy?" Here is our conversation:
Friday, May 8, 2009
Abusing Our Rights As Women
We all know the history of women and how they had to fight for the rights we have today. At one time, women could not vote, could not hold a job, essentially were meant to be seen and not heard. Well I am not going to retell the story of how we have overcome this. But alas, we have. Women are now voting, making major decisions at home and at the office, and women not only have jobs but there are lots of powerful women in the world not only running major corporations but also nations. So as a women I say thank you and do not choose to abuse those rights and try to consider everyone equal.
However, there are many women who take advantage of their rights and push them as far as they can for selfish reasons. I am specifically speaking of women's rights as a Mother. When a couple breaks up, if there are children, the situation is never pretty. History has shown that in the majority of the cases, the mother is granted custody of the children. Courts have always believed and judged that the mother is the more suitable parent for either sole custody or primary custody. This unfortunately makes it difficult to stand by and watch many cases where the Dad is clearly the better parent but is discouraged in his fight. Here is a story of Dad who is getting the raw end of the deal.
******************
Meet Greg. He is a trusting guy who met a girl, named Patty, and fell in love. Together they produced two beautiful children. Not wanting to give up her party lifestyle, Patty smoked and drank through both pregnancies which led to premature births and other complications. But with God and luck on their side, both babies were strong and pulled through.
A few days after their son was brought home from the hospital, Patty left Greg with both children. She told Greg that she hadn't loved him since their first baby was born. Greg devastated, packed up his kids and their belongings and moved back to his hometown where he could get assistance from his parents.
A few months later, Patty decided that she needed to be a mom (most likely pressured by her own parents) and moved to the same town as Greg. She approached Greg and together they came up with a verbal agreement on shared custody. Months and years went by, these verbal agreements changed many times mostly because Patty could not meet her end of the deal and kept changing the rules. She also engaged her parents to pressure Greg into giving up his kids many times to Patty. Of course when Patty needed a baby sitter because there was a party to go to, Greg was the first person she called.
Fed up with his situation, Greg approached a lawyer for some advice, who in turn gave him the statistics of mothers versus fathers and how the fathers typically lose. This was mostly because Greg had a full-time job. How was he supposed to look after his kids if he was working. Whereas Patty was living on welfare and she knew that this made her look like the better "full-time" parent. In fact, she tormented Greg about it.
Today, Greg continues to send child support payments to Patty for both kids. They now have a verbal agreement to share the kids. Greg gets them on his days off and Patty on the days when Greg works. Patty on the other hand... APPARENTLY (witnesses have said) goes to the bar even on days when she has the kids. The kids tag along. She has a new boyfriend who has a daughter of his own who takes priority. Patty makes frequent calls to Greg and tells him how their children now call her new boyfriend Dad. This breaks Greg's heart. She continues to torment him but when the kids both need to go to the doctor or had to have surgery, Greg is always the one who takes responsibility.
******************
Why is that some women are nasty enough to learn the law and the rights that they have as women and choose to lie so they can get what they want. Patty knows that if she stays on welfare, she looks like the better parent as the full-time, stay-at-home mom.
I have even heard of another story, where a women isolated her husband from his family and friends. When she grew tired of him, she left him, took the kids and ran to a shelter claiming to be abused. He has never abused her and would never hurt anyone. She is now trying to keep him even from having phone calls with his children. He is devastated and wants only to have the chance to speak with and see his children.
If you know of similar stories of women who abuse our rights, feel free to share or comment.
However, there are many women who take advantage of their rights and push them as far as they can for selfish reasons. I am specifically speaking of women's rights as a Mother. When a couple breaks up, if there are children, the situation is never pretty. History has shown that in the majority of the cases, the mother is granted custody of the children. Courts have always believed and judged that the mother is the more suitable parent for either sole custody or primary custody. This unfortunately makes it difficult to stand by and watch many cases where the Dad is clearly the better parent but is discouraged in his fight. Here is a story of Dad who is getting the raw end of the deal.
******************
Meet Greg. He is a trusting guy who met a girl, named Patty, and fell in love. Together they produced two beautiful children. Not wanting to give up her party lifestyle, Patty smoked and drank through both pregnancies which led to premature births and other complications. But with God and luck on their side, both babies were strong and pulled through.
A few days after their son was brought home from the hospital, Patty left Greg with both children. She told Greg that she hadn't loved him since their first baby was born. Greg devastated, packed up his kids and their belongings and moved back to his hometown where he could get assistance from his parents.
A few months later, Patty decided that she needed to be a mom (most likely pressured by her own parents) and moved to the same town as Greg. She approached Greg and together they came up with a verbal agreement on shared custody. Months and years went by, these verbal agreements changed many times mostly because Patty could not meet her end of the deal and kept changing the rules. She also engaged her parents to pressure Greg into giving up his kids many times to Patty. Of course when Patty needed a baby sitter because there was a party to go to, Greg was the first person she called.
Fed up with his situation, Greg approached a lawyer for some advice, who in turn gave him the statistics of mothers versus fathers and how the fathers typically lose. This was mostly because Greg had a full-time job. How was he supposed to look after his kids if he was working. Whereas Patty was living on welfare and she knew that this made her look like the better "full-time" parent. In fact, she tormented Greg about it.
Today, Greg continues to send child support payments to Patty for both kids. They now have a verbal agreement to share the kids. Greg gets them on his days off and Patty on the days when Greg works. Patty on the other hand... APPARENTLY (witnesses have said) goes to the bar even on days when she has the kids. The kids tag along. She has a new boyfriend who has a daughter of his own who takes priority. Patty makes frequent calls to Greg and tells him how their children now call her new boyfriend Dad. This breaks Greg's heart. She continues to torment him but when the kids both need to go to the doctor or had to have surgery, Greg is always the one who takes responsibility.
******************
Why is that some women are nasty enough to learn the law and the rights that they have as women and choose to lie so they can get what they want. Patty knows that if she stays on welfare, she looks like the better parent as the full-time, stay-at-home mom.
I have even heard of another story, where a women isolated her husband from his family and friends. When she grew tired of him, she left him, took the kids and ran to a shelter claiming to be abused. He has never abused her and would never hurt anyone. She is now trying to keep him even from having phone calls with his children. He is devastated and wants only to have the chance to speak with and see his children.
If you know of similar stories of women who abuse our rights, feel free to share or comment.
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